The Struggle is Real

I love food. I love to cook. I love inventing new recipes. I love feeding my family. I love entertaining. If I won the lottery tomorrow after putting in the time to make sure that my office was taken care of and everyone was trained properly I would quit my job and go to culinary school. Probably in Tuscany.

If you are anything like me you understand that the struggle to diet is a real struggle for me. Not because I can't give up taco bell and pepsi (although that's hard too, but probably more so because of all the chemicals I've become addicted to in fast food and the sugar that has a tendency to rule your life in soda) but because I love food. It's hard for me to eat things plain jane. It's hard for me to just eat chicken breasts and green beans. (If only I could lose weight by eating my bruschetta chicken with fresh buffalo mozzarella melted on top of it and a side of garlicky green beans... *sigh*)

I love to eat out. But I'm not talking chain restaurants. I'm talking about the amazing local restaurants that cook with fresh ingredients, use lots of veggies, only have farm raised and antibiotic free meat, but also tend to use heavy cream and lots of bacon (in everything).

So although this is definitely a first world problem, the struggle is real for me.

I think I've lost about 8lbs in the past couple weeks. Honestly I'm head over heels in love with Advocare. Their vitamins and supplements have made me feel better than I've felt in years, but I probably would be down more lbs if I was being much more strict with myself. But I have to find balance. I can't live in one extreme or the other. I have to live in the middle.

What does that mean? To me it means that I have to keep laying off the fast food and soda or other sugary drinks, including starbucks (I told you the struggle was real!). It means I'm eating at home everyday for lunch. It means Linds and I cook dinner most nights during the week. Dinners that include more veggies and less pasta or carbs. It means I keep getting up at 6am everyday to start my morning with a workout and that I need to start adding gym time in the evenings to do weights and a bit more cardio. It means when I do eat out I need to be eating at only the local restaurants that I love and I know where their ingredients come from. It means I'll still eat dairy because my goodness goat cheese and bleu cheese are my two favorite ingredients. It means I will probably keep drinking red wine when I'm out to dinner. It also means I can take my love for cooking and use the organic produce delivery we get every week and do something super creative with it.

I need to keep pushing forward. Keep loving myself. Keep carrying myself with confidence. Keep realizing that it doesn't matter if I weight 130lbs or 300lbs, that this body is mine forever and it's capable of love and generosity. But in that very same nature this body is mine forever and I need to take care of it and respect it.

Life can't be lived in one extreme or the other. A good life is lived with balance.

Signed: The girl who is searching every day for her balance.